Perspective

“Challenges, problems, success, failure, achievements and many more such words we use throughout the day to express our life situation to others. At times we share our life situations with other and at other times we keep it to ourselves but whether we express or not life situation happens. Most of the time the life situation feels like uncontrollable and unpredictable. Sometimes we take action to be better prepared to face the life situation or we try to make the uncontrollable or unpredictable thing to happen for us by controlling related situations and predicting its happening time and intensity. Nobody has any control but most try to control and nobody can predict but all try to predict.”, A colleague of mine Sitesh, was blabbering sitting beside me in the waiting hall of a hospital after admitting Jai, who complained about severe chest pain and was sweating uncontrollably while in office. We suspected heart attack. My friends words made no sense and my constant effort to find conclusion of his statement or in other words to understand what he is trying to convey made me tired, very tired.

I got up to get a coffee from the canteen of the hospital. Although my purpose was not to take the conversation forward and tire my brain further when I am already tired of thinking what will happen to my friend who is admitted as his family is not in the town and his wife is in later stage of her pregnancy. I being very close to Jai made me tired of thinking what will happen if he dies. His daughter is in primary school and he is the only earning member of his family. I asked Sitesh if he wants coffee. He responded stating caffeine is not good when you are tensed and started talking about its negative effects. I tried to vanish from that situation.

When I came back I found doctor coming out from the emergency. I went running to him. He said it was nothing to do with heart but severe gastritis. He should be  fine in couple of hours. I was relieved and went to meet him. He was advised to take rest for couple of hours so we left for office leaving him in hospital for the night. On our way back Sitesh again started his philosophical lecture, “You must have thought about heart attack and its consequences and made yourself tired by now. You must not think too much ahead of time unless you need to plan for it. You see yourself. You have harmed yourself by having coffee and cigarettes due to the unnecessary tension.”.

I was unable to take it anymore. I stopped my car on a road side and turned towards him, “Its easy to talk all you have been blabbering since past couple of hours but when a near and dear one is at danger it is not mind that works but the emotions. You do not have any attachment towards Jai and you don’t know his family so you are meeting just an office colleague whose life or death, existence or nonexistence does not matter to you hence you can be philosophical and practical but I cant. He is like my brother and I can feel the pain that his family may go through if he is in danger. I do not need your advice at this time but just a company which can help me if I need extra two hands if I need. If you feel you can do any better to a person at distress then just try to empathize and do not try to drag the person out of the situation. It does not help but hurts.”, I thought I made my point loud and clear.Started my car. Did not utter a single word.

Next day Jai go discharged and I took him back home. I found Sitesh there at his home along with Jai’s wife and daughter waiting for our arrival. I was surprised to see Sitesh there but decided to ignore him. In sometime I got to know that Sitesh is Jai’s brother-in-law. Sitesh was Jai’s wife’s brother. That changed my perspective a bit and felt guilty of yesterday’s incidence. But I still felt he needed that lecture from me.

Sitesh came and sat next to me when things at Jai’s home settled. He apologized me for bothering me yesterday. I also reciprocated stating that I did not know that he is Jai’s relative.

Namaste!!!

Stray Dog